Ep.09 Transforming limiting beliefs into superpowers.

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What if I told you that what you consider a limitation of your personality is actually your superpower? That which you reject about yourself is what actually holds the key to your zone of genius. Hello and welcome. This is the Radiance podcast. My name is Erin, and I'm your host.

Okay, so how do we transform our limitations into superpowers? This is something that I have been working on for a couple of years, and it was brought to my attention by a dear friend of mine, a mentor, who gave me this exercise to play with. Recently, I've had the opportunity to actualize it in real life and embody it. This is because I've recently had the opportunity to practice the cultivation of healthy boundaries through different scenarios with my loved ones. There were two, in particular, that were very much in the same theme that I'm going to talk about now. They really struck my ego. When you feel this, when somebody says something to you and you feel like they stab you, like there's a hurt, that is a clue to pay attention to because that is a portal to something bigger for you to explore.

Okay, so what happened recently is I was invited to this beautiful offering by one of my dear friends. When I committed to going, I was all in. Yes, I'm doing this. I made a deposit. I bought my ticket. But then, as time passed, I looked at my calendar. And this very special offering is landing on the same dates as when I'm going to have my period. So I was like, "Oh no!" Let me feel into this because this particular offering requires a big physical effort. And when I have my own time, when I am menstruating, I like to be still. I like to lay horizontally on the earth. I like to be grounded. I have this sensation of the blood flowing downward. So there's an energetic pull going down into the earth. I allow myself to be in the earth, to be grounded, to be still, and to go through my death-rebirth process. I go into a very trance-like state where I'm connected to different dimensions of reality. I can't really function in the mundane. So it's really hard for me to engage in chit-chat or superficial conversations. I go very deep. And so I'm very careful with the environments that I put myself into. My body and my energy are very open. So I've made it a practice to be in my personal "red tent," where I'm very selective about the people I interact with and the environments I enter. So I'm mostly alone in my house and I just allow myself to bleed.

Going into this offering, and being very exposed to the elements of nature, being around a lot of people, and engaging in a big physical effort, when I tapped into my inner knowing, my deep feminine womb wisdom, the answer was no. And I was like, "Oh no!" Like, hmm, let me think about this because I've already made a deposit, I've already committed, I'm going to disappoint my friend, etc., etc. So when I addressed this with him, I took responsibility because I wasn't being very direct in why I decided not to go. I was still in this in-between state of figuring it out if I could do it because I have done something like this before, but I had to force myself. And I can do it. Of course, I can do it. I'm strong, I'm young, I have energy, and I could totally do it. So I was like, "Oh no!" Maybe it's worth it to push myself, to force myself to go into this trip so that I can have this amazing experience with my friend, which I really, really, really want to do. But then I was like, no, because at what cost? It's at the cost of my health and my vitality. So when I addressed this with him, he mirrored back that it was probably my resistance to the process, to the journey, to the work. So I sat with that and I was like, "Well, maybe it is. Maybe it's my limiting belief that I can't do this while I'm menstruating." Is it that? And then I was like, no, if I tap into my inner knowing, it's a no.

And then he reflected back to me that he has noticed that I tend to flake out on commitments that are not in full alignment with my desires. Then I pull back from commitments. And so he was telling me, he was reflecting this behavior of being flaky and not being reliable. And this really hurt my ego because my tendency in life has been to people-please. I'll go into a little bit more of that behavior of people-pleasing, of appeasing. I'm a very flexible person, and I usually say yes to my friends, to my family. I participate in life as much as I can. So in these moments where I pull back, it's the resource I'm in my space to resource myself. Being seen as flaky because of that really hurt my ego. And then going into this behavior of people-pleasing again, I am participating in life, I say yes. I want to please my loved ones. Of course, I want to please my loved ones. I want to give my loved ones pleasure. I want to give my beloveds pleasure. And that's not only my family and friends, but my community, my patients, my clients. You know, of course, I want to give people pleasure with beautiful experiences and with whatever is in my capacity to give. This is just part of my makeup. This is part of my superpower.

But in this behavior, there's a light and the shadow. Because then as women, I see this tendency over and over where we put other people's needs before our own, and also we tend to appease because we don't want to rock the boat. Because we're scared of being persecuted, tortured, and killed, like in our inner DNA information. There's the wound of being persecuted and being killed. So we don't want to rock the boat. And then also because of obligation and guilt, of not doing enough, not being enough. All of these limiting beliefs that come up. So then I was tapping into that and I was like, okay, that's my ego being hurt. I'm just going to allow the emotions to come and go. So I allow the sadness. I allow the hurt. I allow the frustration. I allow all the emotions to come and go like the waves of the ocean.

And then I was like, okay, let me take in this information of me flaking out, of releasing commitments or backing out of commitments because it's not in full alignment with my physical, emotional, or spiritual needs. And then I was like, you know what? I'm going to own this. And I'm actually going to celebrate it. I'm going to celebrate it as part of my superpowers because it is important to be able to cultivate and practice healthy boundaries. This reminds me of the archetype of the rose. The rose is a beautiful, delicious, aromatic, juicy, soft, open flower. It's so beautiful. It's the full Shakti. But you know what? The rose has thorns. The rose has a protection mechanism that if you mess with